STUPID COMMENTS...LET'S HEAR 'EM !!!

I'm putting together a list of stupid comments made by poker players & I need your help!! what is the most rediculous thing you've heard at the tables ??

" I really don't care if I win or lose " after making about 6 rebuys in a satellite to a $10,000 tourney (10 buy ins = 1 buy in to the main event )

" It's a freeroll !!! " a great excuse for poor play!!

" they were SUITED " donkey mating call

" I have the nuts " flop was 9d 10d Kd he had Ad 3d ( i was holding the Jd Qd)

" I knew it would be there " when some DONK hits a 1 outer on the river

" pot odds baby " UTG raised all in & it was folded to him in the BB

" how could you call with that?" ummm.... i flopped top pair & an open ended str8 flush draw

" #$(& you , you @^$hole " i had pocket 10s, flop was Kh 10h 10s & he hit his flush draw on the river & bet all in


these are just a few of 'em, please feel free to add as many as you like ! the more rediculous the better !!!

" way to chase " razz tourney on FTP: on 4th st I had 5 4 3 2 he had Q 9 showing & caught a 7542A & i bricked out & I was the one chasing LMAO

Online poker is RIGGED!!!!!!!

Here's one I hear all the time on Absolute Poker:

"F%$&ing AP!"

And one I hear in live low-end cash games alot, especially the Indian Casinos that allow the 18+ crowd to play:

"I've got the Ace," (when there's another ace on the board)

The Ace? The Ace?? Aren't there 4 of those in the deck?

Donkey!

That is the stupidest.

I should have called

I'll donate

Let's gamble

I have to get home anyway

I will call your bet and raise you....(idiots...you call OR raise)

"I'm all in" When it is a limit game and they have stacks of chips

Dueces never looses (and they pronounce loses 'looses')

I don't f...ing believe it! Do you believe this sh..? (It is poker, what surprises you?)

I hate this game

I am never coming back here again.

I'll play you heads up any day

F...ing dealer

I'd call you if you weren't so cute

You don't have any of that!

these stupid bots always win! (bots play poker?)

If it wasn't for the river I would have won! (lolol duhh!)

this one was pretty funny. I'm playing 7stud hi/lo on AP the other day & on 5th street I have a 7 hi str8. this clown at the table just keeps raising & I can see from his up cards that I have him beat bad. on 6th st i catch an ace,improving my low, long story short we're betting & raising like crazy & after 7th st he says " you're an !$&hole" " AP just loves guys like you" when the betting is over he has 4 5 8 Q 8 8 Q & it's a split pot. so i ask him "how much could they possibly love ME when they just dealt you a runner runner full house to beat my straight? " i got no reply

I think you guys pretty much covered most of what I see/hear but I can think of two more:

- calling someone "river rat" after the river gives the opponent the better hand
- "do you want me to call?"

I heard this one tonight watching the WSOP "Just this One" I guess they were praying

onyl few words. TILT ownz ppl and breaking them lifes.
I got owned by programe lots of times

How about @##$ you ^%#@ @%# @%%# I have seen that on fulltilt a few times LOL

I don't know if this is the same as konawajim, but I absolutely despise it when people say "one time." Unless they've never won a poker hand ever, they should really just STFU.

what is that "just this one" garbage..i have also heard this saying at the tables......i dunno about praying but they sure sounds like it

The one I like is

Time for bed I'm all-in some body call me.

Usually works to get one or two callers and they turn over pocket ACES
and the next line always is

Well I guess I can stay up and play for a while since I don't have to get up early.

ahahahah hogster that's a funny one.

I would never say it though :p

"But I had big slick"

"But I saw a pro do it"
lol

"I know you are bluffing" - then he folds!

"Who the hell calls a raise with 2 5?"

I do... jeez everybody knows that. What a stupid question!

"I'm giving up poker forever."


ummm, no you're not!

their are so many to chose from but i think ya'll have covered most of them...but one I see ALOT is when a player losses and sez.." this site is rigged " ....'specially if seen in a small freeroll ...come'on get a brain .. if you are going to rig a game it sure wouldn't be a $100 freeroll

"durrrr is a fish"

I hate when people say this. I doubt they could make millions as easy as Tom Dwan can!

oops

"" It's a freeroll !!! " a great excuse for poor play!! "

Oh yeah? not only excuse for poor play..but great comment on any any bitter comment at a freeroll table