Jokes at the table

Back in Cali I was the floor manager at a small card room. One of my favorite things about that job was the fun we had at the table. I heard so many great jokes there. This is one of my favorite....

A man came home from work one day to catch his wife packing her bags.
"Honey, what are you doing?" He asked her with both shock and concern in his voice.
Without stopping what she was doing she answered, "I heard you can get $400 a BJ in Vegas."
He ran to the bedroom closet, grabbed a bag and began throwing everything he could grab into it. She, now as equally confused as he was asked, "what are YOU doing?"

He looks up and replies, "I want to see you live on $800 a year!"

Anyone have any they would like to share? I have many more.

once time dude bets 666 chips. Other tell OMG SATAN. Possible he have Q8.
Then he called. And dude who beted 66 had Q8 and won. I though OMG lol hahahah owned